Thursday, June 14, 2007

To Sleep...Perchance to...

DREAM? Oh yeah, I dream - in color - every night!! I usually can recall my dreams upon wakening, and then again through the day as similar situations present themselves. I'll think, where have I heard/seen that before?..and it will remind me of a dream. Funny how that works. If I go to sleep chanting "I want to dream of____", sometimes it happens, sometimes not.

I have not been sleeping deeply though, according to my doctor, as he has no other explanation for my being tired all the time. I am not rested when I wake and continue to yawn off and on during the day.

I have been for one sleep test...complete with wires on my head and other appropriate places on my drugs...and a dark, dark room where I could be watched by cameras that were watched by technicians who recorded all the machine findings. Guess test results said my sleep test was ABNORMAL! Well duh! I think I knew that already...but now I am up for another test, this time with a c-pap mask. How they are going to attach that with all the other connections I'll have should be quite an experience!! And it should make me sleep....deeper??? We'll see. Oh the watching and recording they will do.

I have a recurring nightmare about not being able to find 'the baby'...sometimes a child, sometimes an animal...who needs to be fed. I have actually walked into my children's room, looking for the baby, asking "where's the baby?", sometimes sobbing. Hmmm...hope I don't' have that dream tonite.

Other dreams...well, THOSE are ones I'd like to have more often...the kind from which I don't want to wake up....the kind I definitely remember....gee, I'm getting sleepy just daydreaming now!!

So, perhaps I'll dream...and perhaps there will be REM...but if not...guess there is always the chance for more tests!! I dream about those tests...go figure!!

Dream from last night as best I can recall:

Returning from a trip and see a tornado beginning to form over the city, Karen points out that it is near the Waco water tower. Arrive in town to see much damage, flooding, etc. Walking down the street, looking toward river, see lots of different types of shoes floating in the river, then begin to see family I know, only it is several years in the future. I see Gavin (now 4) who looks to be about 8 or 9, running around in a football uniform; I see Katie and Hannah, looking very grown up - but none of them have on shoes. Karen, Kyle, Alison, Nate and I attempt to drive across a flooded street, now a small river - Kyle is driving Karen's Expedition - we land in the water like the flume ride at 6 Flags, and make it across, only to find a very narrow road. We continue on this road and come across a building that is mostly in shambles, but people are gathered there to eat..its sort of like a restaraunt on the beach. I run into Felix from Sears who takes me into a smaller room where lots of folks are sitting and he introduces me, and I tell him I am looking for my kids. The group of us continue to look at the destruction left from the tornado and realize its not getting any better any time soon. I see Stephanie and she points to what looks like Jim's truck outside a window, explaining that he's been living in it for about a year, and that the kids don't talk to him, but when I go out a door and towards the truck, he is sitting on the bumper, his face looking very swollen, eyes barely open, eating a big slice of watermelon. We don't speak, but when I turn away, I hear Lindsey call my name. Along what seems to be a boardwalk, she comes out from underneath and asks where I've been, and that Ryan has been looking for me. Next thing I know, Laura is walking me through a busy area - with lots of people - and explaining who is where - including Jazi who is giving birth to three babies - all of whom just developed in her stomach - and are really tiny. We go into what looks like a haunted house, and I see the blind tenor - who's name I can't recall at the moment, but he sings for me and we walk around the haunted house together. In the house is a little store where you can purchase games, etc., and they are selling a mini-version of cranium for about $14. I told them it was a rip off cause I knew they could get the same thing at the dollar store for about $7.

I can only guess as to where some of these elements in the dream came from...some are more obvious to me than others. I am writing this a good 7 hours after waking up - and thats all I can recall right now.

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